Kids These Days...

Kids These Days

You’ve heard it. Maybe, you’ve even said it.

“Kids these days are so much worse.” “Kids these days don’t show any respect.” “Kids these days are different.”

To some extent, I would agree, but if we are to make any progress as a society, we have to stop with this rhetoric.

Before I go any further- let me give you my credentials (a little bit of ethos- for my 10th graders): I have taught in 3 different 6a schools within rural Mississippi. I regularly teach classes full of students who read multiple levels below target. I have also worked at a University in Mississippi where I had the chance to provide academic intervention to college students- many of whom struggled with learning differences. I have witnessed struggling education.

Kids these days ARE different because the world today is different. When we think about “kids,” we think about innocence, but innocence requires an ignorance that these kids are not afforded.

Let’s walk it back a few years. Before the turn of the millennium, regular people had limited access to the internet. Children did not have cell phones. Textbooks were not PDFs. Curriculum did not center around technology integration. Teachers were trained in ways of teaching from paper materials, and the pressures of standardized testing were drastically less. Students were not mentally and physically distracted by the presence of social media and online bullying. Parents were not battling invisible enemies within their house- harbored right inside their children’s cellphones and laptops. People did not have the chance to view the ins and outs of wars and world-altering happenings occurring all over the world.

Everything is different, and this is not something that will change or go away, so if we are to continue to serve children in the way we are called to do, then we have to learn to cope with the changes that are here.

“Worse” is subjective. It implies that there is a reference point to which students are being compared. We have to forget about this reference point because it is not only unfair but irrelevant. I do not claim to be a child-development scientist, but I can imagine that the effects of less physical activity, more availability to world news, unlimited access to the opinions of others, and many more modern elements of society are making it harder for kids to just be kids. And it doesn’t matter. All kids deserve the opportunity to be educated, so saying that they are “worse” only creates a mindset where we mull in misery.

One thing that this generation does that is controversial is that they demand respect- regardless of age or status. When I was growing up, I was often told that I was to listen to my elders and my superiors- despite the manner in which they spoke to me. I knew that I deserved respect, but I also knew that because of my age or my inexperience, I was to just listen and comply. These kids are not being raised this way (in most households), and they are not going to behave in this manner.

They demand respect, and I applaud them for it. Just because someone is younger or less experienced does NOT mean that they deserve less kindness and respect. I am not saying that there should be no chain of command, as this is the only way that there is order in a room of 30 adolescents, but there is a respectful way to go about being a leader. You have to be nice to them, and they have to feel like you like them, or they are not going to listen to you. Why is this so controversial? Why is it so much to ask that we as adults and teachers are just kind to our kids? Are they always going to be respectful and kind back? Absolutely not. They are human, and they are immature. They will scream and cuss and disrespect you, but I promise you that if you do your best to always be respectful in return, it will pay off. I tell my students that I demand respect from them and that they should demand it from me. If I get frustrated and raise my voice, I apologize. Not only does this show my own humility, but it models appropriate behavior that will make them more successful as citizens. They should listen to what I say because they KNOW (without a shadow of a doubt) that I am looking out for them and that I care about them as people- not just because I am older and more experienced.

I think that this demand for respect is a good thing. I think (hope) that instilling in people, early on, that they are worthy of kindness from everyone will create a workforce of bosses who listen to their employees instead of strong-arming them into submission. I think (hope) that it will create a generation of parents who empathize with their children instead of just forcing them into blind obedience. It might even birth a world leader or two who wants to be in charge with the goal of making positive changes to society instead of just seeking to be in power! Are there growing pains when you, as the teacher, are disrespected over and over and made to feel as though your work is futile? Sometimes. I have met students who, even after months and months of my relentless pursuit of their smiles, left my room with scowls on their faces. BUT- because I try my hardest to always greet them with energy and joy, I rest easy, and I am rarely discouraged. My actions towards my students are not personal, positive or negative, and this gives me room to always respect them as they deserve to be respected.

Kids these days ARE different, and while this surely can create hardships, we as teachers have to learn the best ways to cope with the changes and to instruct this new group of different kids. If this does not feel like a mission that you are called to face- that is ok! My husband was once a teacher, and he is now a happier person because he found a new career. I firmly believe that if you do not have a patient heart and a soul that is called to the classroom, you should not be a teacher. Students can tell when you do not want to be around them, and everyone suffers when this is the case.

I’m an idealist, I know. We have covered this, but I also know that all we can do is try our best.

Kids these days are different, so let’s be a different kind of teachers.